I looked to you to define me. I lost my personal power. Perhaps I never owned it? I had no sense of purpose and looked to you to provide it. But, it was not yours to give, and I was wrong to expect it of you. I'm sorry.
A relationship drenched in dependency. How does it change when it becomes two separate selves choosing to be together?
In a parent/child relationship, dependence is both natural and essential. In a relationship between two adults, it is poison.
To idealize and become dependent on another is a hopeless and insufferable contract, not a relationship. There can be no relating when the other person doesn't live up to the picture dependency projects.
What becomes of a relationship when we take ownership of our personal power, removing the burden from the other? And how does the relationship evolve with the removal of dependence and the assertion of two separate selves?
Personal responsibility builds autonomy. Self-governing people don't rely on others for their need fulfillment.
The rewards of self-governance:
Peace — I'm doing the best I can.
Confidence — I'm in charge of myself.
Hope — I choose my future.
Acceptance — Of reality, not fantasy or expectation.
Self-respect — For the courage and strength to live with intention.
Gratitude — For having choices.
After three years of injury, returning to running required implementing new techniques. Practicing new skills increased my capacities. A solid foundation found renewed support in letting go of old patterns and learning new ones. Over time, with care and intention, an enduring passion found new possibilities. Remaining aware and steadfast while moving with healthier strides became essential for my development.
I learned how to thrive without running as a part of my life, yet I prefer discovering better approaches, so I'm able to enjoy it for the rest of my life.
Whether running or relating, when we take ownership of our health (emotional, mental, and physical) and choices, honoring our values and acting with intention, positive adaptation ensues.
When both parties in a relationship are self-governing and self-aware, serenity replaces fear. If we are each responsible for ourselves and share a vision for our future, the best choices for oneself are the best choices for the relationship.
Learner and sharer of all things healthy, active, esteem building, growth promoting, witty and Hawaiian